The list gets smaller

My list of friends shrank by one this weekend. Now he's just an acquaintance. He's lucky to still have functioning arms. That was my first thought. "You do that again, and I'll break your arm" Seriously. My second thought was too cry. I was surprised, ashamed and hurt, physically and emotionally. So many emotions. I have to get control.
This past weekend, a friend in need came over to get his computer worked on. He and I were in my office/workshop, I was working on his computer; my back was too him but I was listening. We were catching up on things, talking like usual. Well, semi-usual. Things have been strained between us since I told him about Caroline about a year ago. I told him the everything. The good, the bad and the ugly. I told him about the hormone use and of my intentions of transitioning.
It didn't go over well. He used every scripture in the Bible to convince me that I was wrong, I was going to go to Hell, and further he didn't really think that I was saved. To top that, he told my wife the very next day all that I told him; to her, I still deny the hormones.
This is the friend that was there for me when my Son died. He has been with me through a lot. I count him as family and a brother in Christ. The bond is tight between us.
Apparently, this bond is only so strong. It can't weather a storm like this. At the end of the evening a year ago I asked him if we could still be friends even though he didn't agree with my decision to quit living a lie.
Over the past year, he and I have still gotten together and been friendly. He still prays for me and quotes me scripture and so on. Tells me that he prays that I'll get saved...
As an aside, do you know that he suggested to my wife that maybe I was molested by my Dad or that fighting in Iraq caused this?
With him, I had drawn the line when it comes to suggesting stuff like that, especially talking about my Dad. This couldn't be further from the truth.
Anyway, this past Saturday night, I am working on his computer and listening to him talk about me. He asked me if I was still taking hormones. I told him no. I am, I just didn't want to listen to another 30 minute lecture or have him go talk to my wife.
The next thing I know, he has clamped both hands on either side of my chest and is pressing inwards to test the firmness of my pecs. First the left side, then the right side. It hurt! I was thinking, "oh shit, did he just boob check me?) and then, wam! there it is on the other side.
Thinking about it, there are a lot of things that I could have done in that instant. Something else I thought of in that instant, is of my wife. I didn't want to bring her back into the middle of this. I want to deal with her and hormones on my terms and not have it underlined by my ex-friends' broken arms. I still haven't processed all the emotions I've done enough crying lately, the slower that happens, the better.
I know I've made a mess of things, and I do want to tell the her, the woman I love with all my heart, the truth. My therapist says that I need to do it with "measured honesty". I think that he means that his boat is not paid off yet. (if you're reading this doc, that was a joke)
Caroline